Digging Deeper: A Testimony

From a young age my parents helped instill in me a love for church and the scriptures, but also the importance of digging into the word ourselves. And I asked a lot of questions as a kid, especially why. And I was really intrigued by science. My parents, they really fostered that love. I remember, we would go to the library and just spend hours poring through all kinds of books. One time while we’re looking at a Christian book catalog, I found this book called Censored Science, and decided to order it. The whole premise of that book was that conventional science didn’t tell the true story. That was the very first book that really introduced me to this idea that Christians should be leery and very skeptical of conventional science. So instead of questioning that idea, I dove right in. I was completely convinced. I stopped digging into natural science magazines and the natural world as much. I only looked for answers in the scriptures and in books written by creationist authors. Those books, they introduced me to this young earth creation model, which, it’s very satisfying, because it says there’s a very simple explanation of how God made the universe. And it has so many firm confident answers and an overarching narrative that is so easy to believe. So as young man, I latched on to it. Even in college, I remember giving a speech for a public speaking class about the Genesis flood. And I really felt like at the time, I had all the answers. But soon after college, I started having this nagging, frustrating feeling that something just wasn’t quite right. With my beliefs, I had these doubts I just couldn’t shake. So I actually went back to the library. And this time, I looked for well reviewed, well known books by well known science authors. And for the first time then, I was exposed to a very thorough, very compelling description of the more conventional scientific viewpoint, that included evolution, ancient planet, ancient universe. I was crushed. I mean, it felt like those books alone had blown up my entire worldview. I started doubting the young earth model in a big way. I started to think, man, you know, if Genesis isn’t reliable like I thought it was, then all of these ideas I bought into must not be true. And maybe I should just leave this Christian thing all behind. But I continued to search for answers. I realized eventually, that there were very sincere Christians who also doubted the young earth model, and had different opinions on Genesis. I remember I read The Great Partnership by Jonathan Sacks and The Language of God by Francis Collins. Both those books argue that faith and science don’t have to be at war with each other, that to be a well rounded person we should appreciate and acknowledge both sides. I didn’t find answers to all my questions in those books, but they encouraged me a lot. They helped me to see that not all Christians are completely skeptical of science, and it’s perfectly okay to be a scientifically literate Christian. If I could go back and share something with my younger self, I would love to tell myself to keep digging into science and the word, to keep asking questions. Ultimately, I came to understand that I did not have to reject faith and I’m so thankful for that.